If you need pre-fetching and 2-phase-commits, a database designed for queues can easily work 3x better than a genetic SQL database.

That's being said, Kafka is not one of them.

In this case, you are the senior that needs to bypass the ORM and just use whatever raw parameterized query support exists in your ORM of choice.

> whatever raw parameterized query support exists in your ORM of choice

That doesn't help with conditional-predicates - that's another major shortcoming in SQL.